Being Called on the Carpet for Someone Else’s Mistake
I'll never forget the first time I was summoned to my boss's office—my heart racing with uncertainty and dread—to explain why one of my soldiers had gotten into trouble over the weekend. The office walls felt like they were closing in as I sat there, perplexed, wondering why I was being ordered to account for a situation in which I had played no part. Looking down at the floor, I realized I was being called “on the carpet” for something I didn’t do.
Frustration simmered beneath the surface; it gnawed at me to think I could be implicated in an event I hadn’t even been aware of. My mind raced through the weekend’s events, searching for any connection—any hint of wrongdoing I could be tied to—yet I found nothing but a blank slate of innocence.
Frustration simmered beneath the surface; it gnawed at me to think I could be implicated in an event I hadn’t even been aware of. My mind raced through the weekend’s events, searching for any connection—any hint of wrongdoing I could be tied to—yet I found nothing but a blank slate of innocence.
The lessons I learned from someone else’s mistake
This was a pivotal and profound leadership lesson for me. It was the first time a leader told me that, as a supervisor, I bore responsibility for every action my team took—regardless of whether I was present at the time. Over the years, I’ve come to appreciate that my boss was illustrating the importance of fostering a strong leadership climate.
My First Sergeant (1SG) was the linchpin of our Ranger Company’s enlisted leadership—a seasoned guide navigating the complexities of military command. With a wealth of experience that exceeded my entire lifetime, he had accumulated more leadership wisdom in a short time as a Ranger 1SG than most do in an entire career.
I vividly recall that early morning meeting in his office—the bewilderment on my face was unmistakable. He saw right through it, recognizing my struggle to grasp the concept of leadership climate. The lessons he imparted that day have stayed with me, shaping my understanding of leadership long after I left his office. They are forever etched in my memory.
My First Sergeant (1SG) was the linchpin of our Ranger Company’s enlisted leadership—a seasoned guide navigating the complexities of military command. With a wealth of experience that exceeded my entire lifetime, he had accumulated more leadership wisdom in a short time as a Ranger 1SG than most do in an entire career.
I vividly recall that early morning meeting in his office—the bewilderment on my face was unmistakable. He saw right through it, recognizing my struggle to grasp the concept of leadership climate. The lessons he imparted that day have stayed with me, shaping my understanding of leadership long after I left his office. They are forever etched in my memory.
The job of a leader is to set the example.
Not only did my 1SG discipline the soldier who got into trouble over the weekend, but he also admonished me for failing to grasp a fundamental lesson that comes with every leadership position: the requirement to lead by example.
At its core, leading by example means demonstrating the values and behaviors you expect from your subordinates. However, it must not end when you’re no longer in their presence. Truly great leaders set an example that endures—even when they’re not in the room. That was the lesson my 1SG was trying to help me understand.
At its core, leading by example means demonstrating the values and behaviors you expect from your subordinates. However, it must not end when you’re no longer in their presence. Truly great leaders set an example that endures—even when they’re not in the room. That was the lesson my 1SG was trying to help me understand.
Your example matters more than your words
Of course, there will be occasions when the people you lead don’t want to follow your example. Sometimes this is because you’re setting a poor example, and they’re unwilling to follow it. However, more often, it has to do with someone being unwilling to live up to the standards you set for yourself and for those you lead.
This was the case with my soldier who got into trouble over the weekend. I had tried to set a good example for this young Ranger; however, the lesson only lasted as long as I was present.
If you consider yourself a leader—any kind of leader, whether a parent guiding children, a coach leading a team, or a boss managing employees—don’t set the bar for leadership so low that you only expect performance when you are present. Instead, aim for the kind of leadership that inspires people to strive for excellence even when you aren’t directly supervising them.
This was the case with my soldier who got into trouble over the weekend. I had tried to set a good example for this young Ranger; however, the lesson only lasted as long as I was present.
If you consider yourself a leader—any kind of leader, whether a parent guiding children, a coach leading a team, or a boss managing employees—don’t set the bar for leadership so low that you only expect performance when you are present. Instead, aim for the kind of leadership that inspires people to strive for excellence even when you aren’t directly supervising them.
How far will they follow your example?
One reason this leadership lesson has stayed with me for so long is that I had to confront the true nature of leadership. It involves much more than merely getting someone to follow your orders. At its core, leadership is about inspiring others to want what you hope they will achieve.
Leadership begins with a foundation far deeper than mere authority. Forcing compliance with your commands cannot be the ultimate objective of true leadership. Rather, genuine leadership is about inspiring commitment to shared values and visions. This kind of unwavering commitment arises from leading by personal example—where actions speak louder than words.
My 1SG taught me that the greatest test of leadership lies in cultivating unwavering commitment to your values. True leadership shines brightest when you're not present. While I hope you never face the difficult moment of being held accountable for a mistake made by someone you lead, should that situation arise, embrace it as an opportunity to strengthen your influence. When those you guide genuinely strive to embody the principles you've instilled in them—even in your absence—that is the hallmark of impactful leadership.
Leadership begins with a foundation far deeper than mere authority. Forcing compliance with your commands cannot be the ultimate objective of true leadership. Rather, genuine leadership is about inspiring commitment to shared values and visions. This kind of unwavering commitment arises from leading by personal example—where actions speak louder than words.
My 1SG taught me that the greatest test of leadership lies in cultivating unwavering commitment to your values. True leadership shines brightest when you're not present. While I hope you never face the difficult moment of being held accountable for a mistake made by someone you lead, should that situation arise, embrace it as an opportunity to strengthen your influence. When those you guide genuinely strive to embody the principles you've instilled in them—even in your absence—that is the hallmark of impactful leadership.
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